I HAD INTENSE DESIRE TO IMPROVE AND MAKE ME PERFECT AND DO THE SAME TO OTHER PEOPLE; WHEN THAT DESIRE WAS GONE, I ATTAINED INNER PEACE
It takes maturity and wisdom to accept that each human being is exactly who he must be and is doing exactly what he came to the world to do, what he wants to do (or is doing nothing because he wants to do nothing); there are no accidents in our lives.
The confluence of the individual’s inherited biological constitution and social experiences produced his personality, his self-concept and behavior pattern, normal, neurotic or psychotic. Whichever personality you see him as is who he must be and came to be. He will be no other person.
When he has learned all that he has to learn from his personality type he changes it, if that is what he wants to do, but you cannot change him or make him change because he carefully chooses who he is to be, to be able to learn the lessons he came to learn.
Ultimately, the only lesson to learn is that the self-concept and its world are unreal and give them up; in the meantime, we believe that we have many lessons to learn and schedule events for us to learn them.
I inherited a problematic body and had a problematic father who did not accept himself as he is, did not accept me as I am, and constantly asked me to be better than I am, because he, too, wanted to be better; he rejected his real self-and sought becoming a different and better self hence was running away from his self and, as such, was unhappy.
I did the same thing and tried to flee from myself, to become ideal and when I realized that I cannot change me and that there is no need to change me I stopped trying to change me and my brain became calm; it was the desire for change, the desire for perfection that drove me and gave me lack of peace.
Now, I know that all people are where they must be and are doing what they must do and that countries are exactly doing what they must do; America is doing the racist thing that it wants to do; Nigeria is doing the corruption thing that it wants to do while pretending that it wants a non-corrupt country.
People and countries do what they must do until they decide to change individually and collectively.
The exigencies of EJ’s body and social experience led her to reject herself; she wanted to become ideal and perfect; she dropped out of school and the system, had children and had the intention of making them ideal and perfect; she talked to them about ideals and did not accept them as they are, and they felt anxiety from her constant drum beat for them to change and become perfect; they left her anxiety making house.
Now she is alone and for the first time will learn to accept her real self instead of the madness of trying to become perfect and make the world perfect. She will give up her delusions that she can become perfect and accept her imperfect self, accept imperfect other people and begin respecting people; she did not respect people for as long as she wanted them to become ideal.
IF PEOPLE WERE PERFECT AND HAD ALL THEIR NEEDS MET THERE WOULD BE NO NEED FOR LEADERS
I used to write on leadership matters; seeing the crummy leaders in Africa, I wrote on how to produce ideal leaders. In time I learned that leadership accepts one’s imperfection and all people’s imperfection and uses imperfect people to achieve incremental goals that help people, not perfect goals that theoretically change people one hundred percent that no leadership can accomplish.
If people were perfect, there would be no need for leadership activities.
In God, unified state, aka heaven, all are in spirit, are the same and equal and have no unmet needs, therefore, there is no need for leadership.
In spirit people have no needs to be met and do not have to organize to work towards meeting those unmet needs.
My core desire for a mixed capitalist and socialist economy that provided all children with publicly paid education through university and or vocational colleges and paid health insurance for all people remains intact. Some values are existential and cannot be given up unless the person wants to die. I am a social democrat and that is all there is to it.
July 23, 2022