Sunday, 04 February 2018 20:40

We the True Nigerians Are Saying "No" to Rape and Sexual Harassment

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Essay contains some profanity and offensive language. Read at your risk. Names are fictitious but facts are real.

Rape brutalizes all the Nigerians, not just the victim but the rapist as well. A college professor once said to a woman he was teaching on American campus,“Pauline, you look good in that dress ; I like your choice of clothes.” She said professor was a sex pervert and threatened to take him  to court because, he said,  he was sexually harassing her. On a Nigerian college campus, the Professor could rape and even get away with impregnating the student. Rape is bad, worse that boko haram, and all true Nigeria are in staunch opposition

What would an American President, whom numerous women have accused of sexual harassment, say to a Nigerian contemplating raping his coworker? “ You grab the harlot by the pussy, shake her until her breasts become  a pair of black jello, then  toss her into a bed of wild ostrich feathers before pouncing on her in your hut.” Rape is bad, worse than boko haram, and all true Nigeria  are in opposition

In Nigeria, sexual harassment is not a buzz word; it is not often heard that some boy has raped some girl. Yet, many women suffer sexual abuse, and few people ever notice. Why? It is because sex is not discussed openly in the Nigerian community. It is so hush-hush you wonder what the helI is good about rape. . I am hearing  a juicy “tory” about the State Governors and high ranking politicians who send their drivers to women’s university hostels to pick up beautiful undergraduates for one-night stand. Because these girls often watch American movies, they are proficient at sucking men's dick and being fucked in the ass. Nigerian men like the crazy stuff. The crazier the better. That's how the girls are sexually abused.

I know one  cranky old trader who took a 14-year-old  from a girl’s boarding school in one state and drove her in his 404 to Lagos to have sex. The girl was begging the 40-year-old lover: “Please don’t impregnate me. My mother will…” The girl man said the man told her: “Wait now. I de come.” By the time the old man had finished with her, the girl was a week awol (away with without official leave) from school. By the American law, the man was a rapist and the girl his prey, quarry, victim, target.

Some Nigerian young women are raped, preyed upon at school under teachers’ noses, ravished at home when parents are at markets. Others are lured with promises of payment of college tuition. Many are given fake pledges to assist parents with support. False promises of marriage that never materialize are common. A few get passing grades in college courses they have clearly failed.

The bottom line is this: Nigerian females have long been victims of child molestation and sexual harassment, though they didn’t  know what they were dealing with. Nigerian women are too slow to understand that rape is a crime, and the Nigerian legislature has been too slow to recognize the seriousness of rape and sexual harassment. Senators ought to respond with appropriate laws proscribing the behavior.

Sex education  was not taught at school when this writer and age- mates were groping teenagers, thinking it was fun .  Boys pulled girls ‘dresses up to expose bare buttocks. There was  a huge laughter. I don’t know about now, but I hear things have changed very little. Females continue to be exploited, sexed and harassed. True Nigerians ought to stand up and say “No” to rape and sexual harassment.

A woman needs to be schooled to say “No.” Someday, the Nigerian women will learn the techniques men use to victimize them and how to turn men’s machinations around to the woman’s  advantage. Men and women are at war, the war of the sexes.  Most men, white, black and of all nationalities, are predatory by nature, meaning they are potential rapists. Nigerian men, being who they are, are a bit clumsy in romance and find the use of force easier and quicker. They have a lot to learn and work on.  

The purpose of this essay  is to advocate respect and equality of the sexes in a Nigerian society where rape , sexual harassment , exploitation of our women are not only to be fully condemned  as evil but also considered serious enough to warrant a police complaint and prosecution. Many parents consider a child’s report of sexual abuse as an inconvenience that is best not paid attention to. The essay takes a very hard look at men who play major roles in the problems associated with abuse of women. A gentleman respects ladies.

 It is the suspicion of any serious student of culture that sexual harassment of women takes place in many communities and it’s more pervasive in a male-dominated society like Nigeria. While the American woman is fighting tooth and nail pushing back and winning court battles against her male attackers, the women in Nigeria are at their wit’s end .

The Nigerian women seem to accept sexual harassment as one of the burdens women are called upon to shoulder for the simple reason that they are the weaker vessels and they possess the PHAT (pussy, hips, ass, and teats) which men want to enjoy without the benefit of marriage. Rape is victimization, persecution, oppression, abuse, harassment, or ife ojo (Igbo for a very bad thing).

 Some women welcome sex attackers for various reasons, such as freedom from inhibition, sexual exploration, or need for popularity. Merchants print popular tee shirts to call attention to women’s sexuality, such as I AM READY WHEN YOU ARE, I AM A VIRGIN, and so forth. The purpose of this essay is to give helpless Nigerian women facing insidious sexual harassment a fighting chance.

Women are no longer what they used to be in the past when the popular paradigm or perception was  that since both  he and the victim enjoyed the sex act, no one was at fault,  that women in general initiated and welcomed sex at any time, with anyone, at any place.  Women were perceived as the acquiescent receptors of men’s sperms and men as the ever-ready depositors or ejaculators. The Nigerian law enforcement and justice system often do not pay serious attention to reports of sex abuse brought by women.

 “It’s all your fault, “ they tell the young women, “You wanted it and you got it.” . There is a joke about a man who was accused of sexual battery and brought before a judge. The man was set free to go after he had the judge and court in stitches with laughter. In the defendant’s ridiculous defense against the crime, he said to the Judge,  “It sweet me , it sweet her, who go pay?”. He was saying in essence that since he and the victim enjoyed the sex act, no one was to be found guilty of rape. His rape case was dismissed and he was acquitted because stealing pussy required some cleverness.  Accused was a genius.  

Some men thought women were unlettered, too trusting, gullible, terribly in need of sexual intercourse, and easily let astray in matters dealing with love and sexuality.  It is not that the Nigerian women are using the condom less frequently than they are utilizing the bottom power. The smart Nigerian woman is realizing that there is more to life than just the usual bam-bam-thank-you-madam game which is sweeping across the land.

Women ought to listen carefully when they are told to “get off your bedroom antic, get into the boardroom, and avoid being kobo-kobo harlots.” They ought to dive into science, math, technology, and cyber security, and increase the dismal percentage of women in the Nigerian legislature.  

Women of American are learning fast and are using allegations of sexual harassment as a hatchet to bludgeon men into submission and coach their men on how to treat women. Why are the Nigerian women fixated on early marriage stuff and having babies to fill oba ji (Igbo for barns where yams are tied  up to prevent rotting)? Can sex and marriage wait?

This reminds us of the Nnewi , Anambra,  girl named Angela we ran into at a  wedding  party in Boston, USA. Angela had earned the PhD degree in microbiology at age 26 years. Her cousin has the PhD in chemical engineering. Angels had no time for Nigerian men whom she described as deceptive and untrue in love. “All they want is sex,” she said, “and then they drop you.”

After arguing with her Nigerian parents, the 26-year-old (now 30) declared a coup and damned the consequences. She told Ma and Pa: “No bride price and no traditional wedding. No nothing. Leave me alone.”  She’s a sharp shooter with words. All Pa and Ma did was to ask neighbors: “What ‘s wrong with children born  these days?”

Angela demanded all hands taken off her sexuality. She refused to be cajoled into marrying Nigerian men the type another Nigerian girl named Ifeoma described as  ”liars, liars, liars”. Angela’s cousin described  Nigerian men as being chauvinistic pigs, woman beaters, cheaters and 419 people. Angela  opted for a handsome akata (African American grandson of a slave brought from West Africa). She bought a house into which they both checked in.   She and parents are not on peaking term.

Speaking about Nigerian women, men do not respect them and regard their women as less intelligent. The Nigerian men have not acquired the habit of being suave or sophisticated. It takes more than a long penis to hold a woman’s attention . Handling intelligent women successfully requires immense finesse rather than mere finance. Finesse is sobriety, subtlety, delicacy, diplomacy, discretion, and sensitivity. It also means skill or tact.

 Invariably, Nigerian men do not just abuse their women. These men are pretty destructive, rapacious, grasping, and voracious, and vacuous. Vacuous is the quantity of being empty, shallow-minded, and hollow. Speaking of emptiness,  Nigerians often say: “Empty drums make the loudest noise.”

Haven’t you heard of the Nigerian soldiers who flog females at check points? some law enforcement officials shoot women that reject unwanted sexual advances. The way the Nigerian men demand sexual favors from their women  is crude, pathetic, ignorant. The demand is often followed  with insults and intimidation. That Nigerian women are demeaned, desecrated, and discriminated against doesn’t grab headlines any more in a society that is chauvinistic, uncouth, coarse, vulgar, discourteous and male-dominated. That the Nigerian women are at the mercy of men is a fair indictment.  

Nigerian women seem to have adjusted to the status of second-class citizens.  That they are treated as disposable objects, or as personal  property, is indisputable, irrefutable. Pick up a Nigerian daily newspaper and make yourself cry after reading stories of atrocities committed against women usually by men drunk with pseudo power and whose ego is inflated with the hot air of self-importance.

This writer had a younger sister married to a useless man who watched her die prematurely. Cause of death was a dirty nail that was stuck in Charity’s foot as she walked barefoot across the yard. The sorry-ass husband, an elementary school teacher, didn’t know what to do. A wiser man should have thought about germs and infection and that what was needed when a nail is stuck in a foot was to ask a doctor to administer a tetanus shot or penicillin. Charity died a victim of an abusive man.

Nigerian men apparently are hardhearted when it comes time for compassion. The Nigerian women are so dispensable, easily replaceable, and in oversupply in a Nigerian society that prides itself in having multiple sex partners. Nigerian women come cheap, about a Naira a dozen. They can easily be done away with or replaced with others waiting in the parlor. The Nigerian parents still believe that educating girls is socially unjustified and economically unprofitable. Girl’s education is seen as elusive as celebrating Christmas in June. Men say girls' education cannot happen, and should not.

 Because some men believe that educating women in Nigerian society is loss making, parents are marrying hapless daughters as young as 12 years off to old traders who saunter along, carrying  akpa osikapa (sack of rice) and dragging nwa ewu (small goat). Girls ought to explode, revolt and declare war with parents, demanding their freedom from  omenala  (customary way of doing things) that encourages slave markets dominated by poor parents eager to earn the dowry price.

It must be remembered that the boko haran brainless sect has been  kidnapping girls from schoolhouse and  forcing them without their consent  to become human bombs or sex slaves. When will Nigerian women use allegations of sexual harassment to teach these men some commonsense? When will they sue persons contributing to human trafficking?

When will Nigerian courts begin to hand out prison sentences and exact stiff fines as effective  deterrents on the politicians or religious leaders who marry underage virgins?  Parents who sell underage girls to old cranky, illiterate traders in order to receive the bride price or dowry ought to face prison terms. Why doesn’t someone  sue households that keep young girls at home as baby sitters and cooks when the girls should be learning at school?

Nigerians society exploit young girls under the pretext of following customary traditions and religious teachings. Sexual exploitation of women comes in various forms and shapes. Family baby sitters and housemaids are an exploited group that deserves the protection of the law.

Many  Nigerian mothers who have lost daughters to the Shekau’s sect ought to sue Muslim religious men in charge of every Mosque to which boko haram  murderers belong . Mothers should file suits alleging wrongful deaths or criminal abduction resulting in deaths for the girls who died in Shambissa  Forest.

Sue. Sue. Sue. Collect money! There is a collateral damage, and the statute of limitation for wrongful death is still running. The church or mosque is a business, and any damage your business causes is actionable. The Catholic Church is still paying out millions for the boys the Catholic priests had been molesting over several decades. One who molests and abuses a human being ought to suffer the consequences. That's right.

 Men, particularly the Nigerian businessmen and the politicians or religious leaders armed with stolen money, can fly to Egypt, Sudan, or any of the Muslim countries with the sum of ten thousand dollars to buy a wife. The politician or religious leader flies back with -12, -13, or -14-year-old virgins to replace some of the 4 ageing wives the Qumran says a devout Muslim  is entitled to have. Few Nigerians are able to challenge the supremacy of Sharia law that condemns girls to perpetual exploitation. Parents ought to drag these pedophiles, child molesters to courts. To hell with Sharia courts. God is not wicked.  It’s high time we freed our girls and young women from beliefs that imprison them.

The Nigerian legislators are basically pedophiles, molesting and sexually abusing teenage girls. The battle to combat underage marriages in the legislature  is mired, held up in the clay of pugnacious Muslim men who cite the Constitution and the Sharia law to justify sexual exploitation. Government offices  are not places that lend support to or hide molestation and exploitation of girls younger than the office holders’ daughters.

 When will mothers pierce the religious and “bigmanism” veil and sue for damages arising from rape and sexual harassment? This essay condemns rape and sexual harassment and all true Nigerian should  say: “No! No! No to victimization of any kind.” Women are humans, too, deserving of respect and protection.

The Naija men are predacious, meaning that they live by taking or seizing prey. Some say the men are given to plundering or destroying others for one’s selfish gains. Young women and  teenage girls are victims. Picture Nigeria to be a jungle infested with a ferocious breed of beast-like men.

To give you a better representation of these men, just think of an infestation caused by a plague, invasion, swarm, influx, infiltration, or incursion of a huge number of vultures. That’s where the adjective vulturine comes in handy. Nigerian men seem to be vulturine which means they live by preying on other animals, especially by catching the prey alive. To these men, sexual harassment is a game, a past-time, a recreational activity. Consider boko haram which builds human bombs and sex slaves out of small pre-pubescent girls.

The situation acquires a greater absurdity when the victims are pre-pubescent girls and poor women and the exploitation  is championed by a jungle-like crop of Nigerian “Big Men”, consisting of governors, judges, and legislators. The prey is usually from a weaker group, particularly the uneducated women and young  girls of the oppressed tribes. Poverty predisposes women to exploitation. Men all over the earth seem to think they can buy women in the open market

The American women are resisting being owned by men while Nigerian women willingly and happily advertise themselves and queue up for owners to make their choices. American women are pushing back at harasser and dislodging men’s penises from their pussy. They are running to the courts with the man’s sperm  in the vagina and men’s fingerprints all over the pussy. Women are suing with grievous charges handled by ambulance-chasing lawyers. It is a bonanza!

 If the abuser’s sperm is still in the vagina, that’s all the evidence the court needs to convict. If the American woman says to her boyfriend: “Bob, it’s enough now and stop fucking me,” it is a warning sign that a lawsuit is in the making. It is better for Bob to stop right there and then in the middle of whatever he is doing. If Bob sticks his crooked penis one more time into the pussy, he is liable to be accused of rape, sexual assault, battery, or a range of other frightening charges.

 An accusation of sexual harassment holds true even where the offender is the spouse, boyfriend, or fiance . The American women have been schooled to believe that they have total, 100%, control over their bodies and they alone have that right. Recently, a husband was sent to jail for catching his own wife in bed enjoying sex with another man.

The husband broke into the bedroom with a video camera and snapped.  Because the husband barged into the dwelling and the wife believed she had 100% right over her body, the husband is in violation of the law and faces a 15-year jail sentence for illegal breaking ad entry.  The lesson men ought to learn is to never fuss with a women over the ownership of her body, including the pussy, hips, ass, and breasts  which she can give to whoever she chooses .

 Also, the wife’s lover is suing her husband for unauthorized breaking and entry. American men have learned to be very careful not to take women for granted  and the American women are brutal in asserting  absolute control over their bodies. The American women are using the court system, especially as they see a pile of money waiting to be seized.  Rape or sexual harassment is anathema, meaning it is abhorrence, abomination, loathing, curse, denunciation, or stealing through armed robbery.

Jokes aside, it appears that the Nigerian women (thereafter known as  Naijawoe) are to blame for encouraging  rape and sexual harassment, by failing to raise an alarm when they are being raped, and by falling down to prostrate  before men, kissing the dirt in the presence of their men, and begging for crumbs. Naijawoe falls down before the men who have the power of money or who pretend to have as much money as billionaires Aluko Dangote or Michael Jackson.  What is money when a person is being abused, ill-treated, battered, injured, harmed, mistreated, maltreated, or molested and harassed?

For most Naijawoe, money is power and power translates to money, and money is everything. Women fall down to kiss men’s asses in order to be given a “dash”  just the same way as Muslims prostrate in prayer to Allah, facing Mecca, just to be considered  devout enough to fly free at government expense  on a pilgrimage to Mecca.

Sometimes, you ask yourself: “ Aren’t Nigerian women exact carbon copies of Muslims, the way they worship money and are deeply affected by money? That love of money may explain why the Nigerian women suffer sexual harassment in silence. Isn’t life better than money and body more precious than whatever money can buy? Money seems to affect women in strange ways in all cultures even in Western societies.

Most women are in awe of men who have money oozing out of every opening in the body, including ears and anus.  The more money a man is emitting, or discharging, the more popular women find him.

Someone said , “You can be a leper but so long as you have money, women would flock to you.” Terrible! Women do men’s  bidding, including anal and oral sex in and out of the office, as obedient dogs or pets do for their owners who feed pets with meaty bones. Why? Men have money, and women love money.

 Smart men know that  Nigerian women and money do not mix, just as oil and water do not come together. Smart men keep money and sex separate so they do not mix. They let woman see the money but give her very little. The woman would stay loyal like a lapping dog, waiting for more money..

When will the Nigerian women stop that nonsense and demand  their equality and respect? Stop begging and start training for lucrative careers in science, math, engineering, and technology.  In Nigeria, men are in control of resources, they are the privileged few, the Big Oga, whom the bank managers worship, and who walk the corridors of economic and political power.

Ask a Nigerian woman to choose between education and money, and she would readily ask you, “I go chop book? Na book go feed me?” Some may ask: “You think na education go buy me a Mercedes Benz?” Other women quip, “ No, na money go buy am.”  A friend of this writer has three daughters who are lawyers, and each is married to men with little education, traders with millions of Naira in Diamond Bank.

The Nigerian  politicians are classical abusers who use our tax dollar and oil revenue to abuse women, and they house these women in apartments paid for with Naija government money. These bottom-power women  are fed jollof rice and garri bought with Naija government money. The Naija politicians travel around the world with their obedient bottom-power mistresses, leaving wives at home to be sexually abused by the houseboys and drivers. What goes around comes around. Na so it be!

Women in America are seeing the light, and they are having a field day making sexual harassment allegations against men whose careers are being derailed and toppled down.  Several American men in sports, media, and business have had their reputation, career, and fortunes torpedoed by allegation of sexual impropriety. To torpedo is to ruin, destroy, wreck, thwart, sink, undo, scupper, or spoil.

The damage the accusations of sexual harassment create could precipitate embarrassment, ridicule, loss of income, resignation, and being  perceived  in bad light, leading to family breakup and eventual divorce. The list of aftereffects of sexual harassment and rape goes on . The American men who have been accused of sexual  harassment  is growing longer day by day.. The list is lengthening, and men are paying out large sums of money to settle out of court.

We are just finding out that the American President Donald Trump is rumored to have paid a prostitute named Stormy Daniels the sum of $130,000 to keep her mouth from spilling the beans that Trump committed adultery with a prostitute named Stormy Daniels while still married to his second wife Melanie.  Whether the allegation would lead to divorce is yet to be seen.

It is rumored that the penis of a man accused of sexual harassment shrinks to a third of its normal length, he may experience delayed ejaculation, premature ejaculation, or he would lose interest in sexual activities for a while. The embarrassment is unbearable.

Would the President divorce his wife? Would the other women also sue? Would he toss back and forth in bed all night without having a whiff of sleep? An accusation of sexual harassment makes a man feel like hating women forever. It makes one feel like this writer felt the last time he had iba (Igbo for malarial fever).

Come to think of it, American men are beginning to find out that an allegation of sexual harassment is a two-edge sword, just like the piece of metal we used to cut grass with as we were growing up in Nigeria. The implement was called a cutlass. It was made of a three-foot long piece of pliable or flexible metal that was sharpened on both edges. The knife was swung left and right as one walks into a field of tall grass.

Isn’t it possible that   the Nigerian women can be making trillions of Naira suing Nigerian men in courts for rape and sexual  harassment  and teaching the Nigerian men a lesson they would never forget?  It may make sense if the lawsuits are avoided when Nigerian men begin to learn that rape and  sexual harassment are crimes punishable by a prison term and/fine in any civilized society.

Let all Nigerians rise as one man and declare “No” to any form of sexual abuse.

RAPE:  Sexual abuse of women. Unwanted sex. Forced sex. Don’t do it. You wouldn’t want men to take advantage of your daughter, would you?

BOTTOM POWER: the notion that a woman could get anything she wants by exposing and using her bottom/buttocks for sex.

SEXUAL HARASSMENT: putting pressure on females in order to have sex with them. May include making the school or work environment so hostile and uncomfortable that women are forced to yield.

ALUKO DANGOTE; Billionaire Muslim who is considered the richest man in Africa; he is alleged to have the only known monopoly/domination  in importation of essential products  such as rice, cement, other commodities.

KOBO-KOBO HARLOTRY: Also known as toro-toro or toro na afu  sex. Cheap sex with poor clients.

BAM- BAM –THANK- YOU MA’AM: Quick sex so you thank the woman and let  let her go quickly away before you are caught. . Bad sexual exploitation.

 

Dr. james C. Agazie, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. ; jamesagazies.blogspot.com

Written Sunday, 2/4/18

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James Agazie Ed D

A retired college Professor  with educational backgrounds in law (JD) education (Ed.D, MA) counseling,( MS) and and mathematics.  Write on topics dealing with Nigerian families, marriages, education, and employment.