WHAT IS THE MADNESS THAT MAD CHUKWUMA IS SHOWING ME?
What is the madness that Chukwuma is modeling for me to look at? Look at what he said about me (put down everything about me), put down my father and mother and put down my town.
This is what Igbos do, put Nigerians down, and put down every person in sight. Why do they do it? They do it because they have a neurotic need to seem important, big and see those around them as small.
They must insult all people so as to seem big in their eyes. They want to be as important as God himself; they want to replace God and become God.
When he is not putting down my folks by telling us that my father was his father's gardener and that my mother was his mother's babysitter he is pretending to care for my parents by saying that I did not go home when they died.
Why is it important to him if I did not go home when they died (where is home...the man does not know what home means).
Since when is my business his business? Of course he does not care for me or my parents. Is he not an Igbo self-centered man? Who has ever accused an Igbo of caring for other people?
Most Igbos care only for themselves and do everything they do to seem superior to other people, as the man is trying to seem superior to me (I accept his ego superiority; I accept his mad egos grandiosity).
They quest for importance and significance to hide their existential sense of unimportance and insignificance, their utter sense of inferiority.
They must put other people down to feel vicariously up. They put down Hausas, put down Yoruba's. Even when none of these put downs are called for they do it automatically.
Chukwuma put down my folks, folks he has no idea who they are. First of all, they are not part of any discourse that he is involved in. I do not bring my folks into public discourse except when the other deluded Igbo, to put me down, said that during the war my folks suffered kwashiorkor, and I felt a need to defend them from the mad man's accusation).
Chukwuma has a need to put my folks down and put down my town so as to put up his people and his town up.
Here is the deal; these people have existential insanity. That insanity is that as human beings who denied God they feel that they are egos and egos must feel unimportant and insignificant and then seek to make themselves important and godlike.
The ego cannot make itself important, for importance can only be derived from identification with Christ and his father, God.
The madness that I am supposed to learn from this mad man called Chukwuma is that as an Igbo I was tempted to see me as important in ego terms. I know that as an ego I am not important. I can only be important in God and his son, Christ.
Crazy Igbos teach me not to be like them, not to seek a self-given importance but to seek only worth in God, not in ego.
SAMENESS, EQUALITY AND DESIRE FOR SPECIALNESS
In God, heaven and eternity we are all equal and the same; God created all his sons the same as him. God and his sons are coequal and the same.
The only difference between God and his sons is that he created them and they did not create him or create themselves. Besides that, the authority question, who created whom, God and his sons are equal.
God is a true giver, a true giver gives all he has to those he gives to; God gave his children all his self and power. The entirety of God's self and power is in each of us, but we must acknowledge that our power is derived from God and is not self-conferred, hence Jesus Christ would say: by the power of God in me I can do everything but by myself I have no power and can do nothing.
While in the sameness and equality of heaven we desired to seem special; we wanted to create God, create ourselves and create each other. We wanted to chase God away from his creatorship throne and usurp it and become the creator of the universe. We could not do so in heaven, in reality and slept and do so in dreams.
In the world of dreams, our empirical world, each of us has a sense of specialness. The ego is a self that feels special, that feels better than other egos.
We came into the phenomenal world because we want to seem special, and different from each other, some better than others.
In our world some people seem special. It is a world of specialness. In our world each of us is tempted to see himself as better than other people.
In that light, many Igbos want to see themselves as better than Hausas and Yorubas and other Nigerians.
Are they better than other Nigerians? Of course not but they want to seem better than other Nigerians. They see their tendency to go to school and seek jobs in the white man's new dispensation, the modern world as evidence of their presumed advanced status vis a vis other Nigerians hence feel superior to other Nigerians.
Igbos like Chukwuma with some sort of college education (I understand that the man has a bachelor's degree in some sort of mechanics) look down on other Nigerians.
The more they look down on Nigerians the more Nigerians hate them, for no son of God likes it for other sons of God to look down on him.
God created all his sons equal so if you look down on a son of God you are a sinner and is hated. Most Nigerians do not have good feelings towards Igbos because they perceive Igbos as arrogant and vain glory seeking.
Indeed, Igbos do not only feel superior to other Nigerians but to other Igbos. See, Chukwuma has put Owerri people down.
There are many Owerri people. They are not all like me, forgiving. Many of them do bear grievance and seek vengeance for affronts to their self-esteems; such Owerri persons would feel angry at him for insulting them.
You do not make friends by putting any one down; Chukwuma has not made friends of my people by putting them down.
He may not know it, when that Eldorado of his, Biafra comes into being, Igbos from different clans would be at war with each other and the result is that Biafra would be worse than Somalia.
If the man had any kind of sanity in his dumb head he would build intergroup good feeling by respecting and loving all Igbos rather than insulting some of them.
THE LESSON MAD CHUKWUMA TEACHES ME IS FOR ME TO BE HUMBLE
The lesson that mad Chukwuma taught me is that if ever I had a desire to feel important and look down on other people that I should not do so.
I have supreme self-confidence and tend to see me as the best of humanity; there is nothing that I can do about that self-confidence. Nor is it bad to have positive self-confidence.
Chukwuma told me to be humble. I thank him for reminding me of the need to be humble (even mad men can give you good advice).
However, we must first understand what humility is. If by humility he means feeling inferior to other people he is misguided and misinformed.
I do not feel inferior to any human being born of woman, black or white. I am a son of God and have all the grandeur God's sons have.
In the temporal universe my sense of specialness does not see Chukwuma as anything to admire; to my ego he is a primitive savage; in my ego life I would not want him around me. I like only sophisticated folks around me.
In eternity we are the same and coequal but in time we are not; on earth he is a riffraff, an unwashed peasant boy with little or nothing in his thick head. Be that as it may, I love the Christ in him.
I have been told by some perceptive Nigerians that Chukwuma and his Igbonkwo crowd sees me as their superior and resents it; they subsequently have a need to put me down.
Chukwuma's childish behaviors towards me, I am told, are rooted in his perception of me as his master. I believe that this is also how his people perceive Nigerians. They see Nigerians as their superior and then feel a need to pull Nigerians down.
We have to teach these neurotic people to stop seeing people in terms of inferiority and superiority and, instead, accept the sameness and equality of all people.
I overlook Chukwuma's ego self, his false self and see the Christ in him and love that real self. The lesson he teaches me is for me to forgive his ego, to see his ego as his sleeping, dreaming self, to overlook what his ego does for what he does is done in a dream and what is done in a dream has not been done in God's reality.
Chukwuma's real self, the son of God, still remains as God created him: innocent, holy, sinless and guiltless. His ego madness and penchant for insulting people is part of the delusion and hallucination of his ego but since being ego is done in dreams and the son of God is not an ego, he is not an ego; I overlook what his ego does, his insults for my ego, and see the Christ in him.
When I see the Christ in him I see the Christ in me. But until I acknowledge the Christ in him I cannot acknowledge the Christ in me.
Does this mean that I should validate his ego madness, his desire to seem superior to me and all people and insult people. No; one does not reinforce and affirm insanity; one merely learns from insanity what sanity is not.
One (via the Holy Spirit, Christ mind) corrects insanity and show the insane person corrected behavior, sane behavior.
Sanity lies in love for all people.
By love I do not mean love for the ego but love for the Christ in people. I overlook Chukwuma's insane ego and love the Christ in him.
I do the same to me; I overlook my arrogant ego and love the humble Christ in me. The Christ in me accepts that God created him and that he did not create God hence is humble and in his humility has all the power of God.
A lesson not learned is repeated until learned and when it is learned it is no longer repeated. Over the past ten years, Chukwuma's insanity has repeated itself for me to learn the lesson of my own insanity, my arrogance; that lesson is learned, I am now humble and do not need to see an insane Chukwuma in my world to learn from.
From now on he teaches other people by acting insane for them; he is no longer my teacher for I do not need his insanity to heal my insanity; I am no longer insane (I no longer identify with the ego and its false grandiosity that looks down on some people to feel superior to them; I accept our existential sameness and equality). I can no longer gratify Chukwuma's childish ego of war by responding to it. This subject is now closed. I resume deleting whatever the insane brother mails to my mailbox.
Do I really expect the country bumpkin called Chukwuma and his benighted crowd to understand the metaphysical metaphors that suffuse my writings? No. I do not expect them to understand anything that I write. They are too dense, too concrete to understand abstract metaphysics. I write for me and those like me; the lesson that I am teaching through my writing is for me to learn it; when I learn it and behave accordingly, I am an enlightened person.
October 18, 2016