Tuesday, 28 November 2017 01:17

The individual is responsible for his fate

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THE INDIVIDUAL IS TOTALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS LIFE'S OUTCOME

Ozodi Thomas Osuji

We are tempted to blame other people for our problems. We look around and find many reasons why we should blame other people. We see what they did to us that seem to have harmed us and use those as excuse to blame them and rationalize our problems.

For example, if you are a black man in America you can look around and find white racism and use it to tell you why you seem to have failed in life. There is racism in the land alright and if you look for it you will find it and use it to rationalize why you did not succeed. But the fact is that that is a mere excuse.

The real reason why you did not succeed, whatever success means to you, is you. There is no one else to blame for one's failure or to give credit to for one's success, either; only the individual is responsible for his life's outcome.

WHITE RACISTS CHOSE TO BE RACIST AND PLAY THEIR ROLE AND TAKE THE CONSEQUENCES OF THEIR BEHAVIORS

We are all enacting a script we collectively wrote. We wrote it before we entered the physical universe. White racists play the roles that the script called for them to play; their role requires them to enslave black folks and or discriminate again them; they have to do what the script called for them to do. They must do what they must do for the past and present civilization required them to do so.

Because of their sub human acts their civilization will be replaced by those they oppressed.

FEAR IS THE GREATEST OBSTACLE TO FOLKS LIVING FULLY

If you consider racism seriously you would discover the following reason why it exists. It exists because of black folk's cowardice, their fearfulness and white folk's lack of conscience.

Why did black people permit slavery? Clearly, white folks needed slaves to work on their farms and found Africans amenable to slavery; in the present Africans are so desirous of surviving that they tolerate second class status in Europe and the Americas to live there.

Indeed, Africans tolerate second class status in their own Africa; a very few of them, their criminal leaders, steal most of their moneys and they live in poverty. The people feel that if they demand equity that the thugs that rule them would stick their military and police goon squads unto them and kill them. To avoid harm and death they tolerate the abject poverty they live in in Africa and allow criminals to rule them.

Africans tolerated slavery and second class status in the white man's land and in Africa because they so desire to live at all costs and are so afraid of harm and death that they do not get up and fight for what they believe is right, and if in the process of fighting for justice they are killed so be it; they would have died the free man's death, the heroes death instead of live like slaves.

The slave is responsible for his slavery; his fear of death relegated him to tolerating slavery; the second class citizen is responsible for his second class status, his fear of death prevents him from fighting for equality.

The discriminated person is not as innocent as he thinks that he is; he is responsible for his second class status.

In life the individual is totally responsible for how his life turns out to be. He may not want to believe this fact but he must for it is the truth.

Each person has a pattern of behavior and that pattern of behavior is what is responsible for his life's outcomes.

Instead of blaming other people for how rotten things turned out to be for one, one can pause and analyze one's life style and see the pattern of one's behaviors and change what one needs to change in it if one wants a different outcome from life.

Blaming other people will not change a thing for one; blaming other people for one's life will not improve one's life.

Only changing ones pattern of behaviors will change one's life's outcome.  Obviously, there are a few things in one's life that one cannot change, such as one's body, but that apart over ninety percent of one's life can be changed and thus change one's life outcomes.

SOCIOLOGICAL STUDIES OF OPPRESSION

Sociologists do elaborate studies on the discriminatory nature of America and write tons of materials on their findings.  They show us how a few white men are reaping off the many white men and minority persons.

As we are talking, President Donald Trump and his Republican collaborators in Congress are re-writing the tax code and are about to cut taxes for the rich, help the rich not pay taxes and then increase taxes for the poor and cut the health insurance, Medicaid, that serve the children of the poor.

My question is this: why don't the poor realize that they are screwed in America and rise up and demand social equity?  They are held back by fear.

Sociologists will tell me that the poor in America are deliberately programmed to work against their self-interests otherwise why would they elect Trump, a rich man, as their president. Trump is a known scammer, a con artist who all his life has screwed the poor and stolen from whoever he can steal from, including not pay his taxes to the government.

It is true that America's media and school system socializes young Americans to sing the praises of the political system and not pay attention to its predatory nature.

That been said, it is fear that prevents Americans from rising up and fighting for justice for all Americans.

Terrorized Americans dull their bodies and minds with drugs and or weird sex, homosexuality; drugs and weird sexuality are means of coping with their oppressive political system; they will keep doing so until all of them become drug addicts or homosexuals or whatever deviant sexuality they will discover tomorrow.

Indeed, white men are increasingly cutting off their balls to become women so that they do not have to fight for their freedom. White America is contemptible.

Africans are also despicable. As we talk Libyans are enslaving Africans. Have you heard an African head of state complain about what is done to his people by Arabs? Of course not. Instead, they are too busy stealing their people's moneys to standup for their people's right.  Why do Africans go to Libya so as to smuggle themselves into Europe? Poverty!

If Africa is properly run the untapped wealth in African soil could make every African fairly well to do. But instead of industrializing and developing their continent African leaders specialize in stealing from their people.

Enraged Africans ought to invade North Africa, as a payback for Arabs enslaving Africans for over one thousand years, and colonize North Africa, take it from Arabs, after all Arabs took it from the original Africans who lived there.

ONE MUST OVERCOME FEAR BEFORE ONE CAN LIVE FULLY

One must remove the obstacles to one living fully. The chief obstacle to human growth is fear. One must overcome fear for one to live fully.

Fear stifles the human potential; in fact, fear reduces ones capacity for learning; in fear ones learning ability is reduced to no more than ten percent (if you like to substantiate the obvious then note that Albert Einstein said the same thing that I am saying here; my conclusion is based on my observation not because any so-called authority figure said it).

Fear affects ones interpersonal relationships; it limits the number of friends that one makes; the fearful have very few friends, mostly only those who would not reject them.

Fear restricts the range of what people do and limits their accomplishments in life. I believe that the typical person barely lives ten percent of his potential; the rest are limited by his fearfulness.

Remove fear from your life and you bloom, live fully and accomplish the ninety percent of your potential that fear had prevented you from accomplishing.

PSYCHOTHERAPISTS WOULD NOT ENABLE YOU LIVE FULLY FOR THEY, TOO, LIVE IN FEAR

You do not need to blame psychologists; psychiatrists and other members of the mental health establishment for not helping you remove your fear from your life. Psychotherapists themselves live in fear and are restricted in what they do.  It is not for other people to help you overcome your fear; it is for you to do so.

Fear is existential; no one else made you fearful; you made you fearful for fear is a means for your survival as a separated ego in body; only you can decide to look that fear in the face and give it up by accepting the possible death of your ego and body.

When you look fear in the face and give up what it protects, your ego and body, you begin living fully and unleash your inherent human potential. In Abraham Maslow's terms, you begin to actualize yourself.

The psychotherapists that you expect to enable you to remove fear from your life are mostly circumscribed by fear.

Most therapists are women and passive men; they do not, for example, challenge the social structure they live under (I have supervised tons of psychotherapists, psychologists and psychiatrists, so I am talking from personal experience, here).

The American social structure is inherently oppressive; America's primitive capitalism gives wealth to a handful of people while the majority of the people live in poverty.

Clearly, the American political economy needs to be restructured to social democracy with mixed economy that serves all people. The public must pay for all peoples education at all levels; university included and pays for all peoples health insurance.

These things have already been accomplished in the best governed countries in the world, the Scandinavian countries of Norway, Sweden and Denmark. Therefore, one is not being utopian and talking pie in the sky. I am a realistic idealist.

How many psychologists and psychiatrists are able to fight for social equity? They do not do so; this is because they are really fearful folks and have not overcome the fear that makes them live in the slave plantation that is called America.  Therefore, they cannot help you overcome your own fear.

Only you must understand how fear holds you down and change it, no one else can do it for you. Read books on fear, understand it and see how fear operates in you and struggle to overcome your fear by all means necessary; to the extent that you eliminate your fear to that extent that you live fully.

Please whatever else you do, do not deny that you are a fearful person. Every human being is fearful, in degrees. If you find one fearless person he would live like God.

Jesus Christ lived fearlessly hence lived as God. To live fearlessly you have to eliminate your ego; Jesus eliminated his ego and lived fearlessly hence was literally God.

You and I are not yet living fearlessly for we still identify with ego separated self and body. Do not deceive yourself and say that you do not have fear; be totally honest with you and acknowledge your level of fear and work on eliminating or reducing it.

You probably would not be able to eliminate all of your fear and ego in this life time. Don't worry about perfection, for perfection is the enemy of the good. Just do whatever you can do to live less fearfully.

Whereas this essay is not clinical let me just observe that people with anti-social personality disorders, sociopaths, psychopaths and criminals in general tend to seem less fearful. In fact, what happens in them is that their fear is repressed into their unconscious minds (their bodies seem less prone to quick fear arousal; their bodies are more like animals bodies in their density) but fearful they still are. If they are not fearful how come they steal in darkness, and steal from people from their back. Somatically they tend to evince less anxiety.

Neurotics tend to show more anxiety than criminals. Neurotics have bodies that are prone to anxiety disorder; they tend to have quick fear arousal; perhaps, they inherited less GABA, an inhibitory neurotransmitter and more excitatory neurochemicals such as adrenalin, neuropiniphrine and acetylcholine.  Enough clinical stuff!

ONES EGO TYPE PLAYS A ROLE IN ONES SUCCESS OR FAILURE

Each person has an ego, aka personality. Ones ego type plays a role in one's success or failure in life.  The ego is a separated self; that separated self is protected by fear. To be an ego is to live in fear. All egos, that is, all human beings live in fear.

However, there is such a thing as normal fear and neurotic fear. Neurotic fear, aka anxiety disorder is a special reason why folks fail.

Consider me. I had neurotic fear. As a result of my fear I had a need to avoid people. I felt that if I am close enough to people that they would see me as no good and reject me. I feared rejection. To avoid been rejected I avoided people. I kept mostly to myself.

It is impossible to completely avoid people so I was with people but with people I defended my ego, doing everything to make sure that I am not rejected.

MY DESIRE FOR A BIG EGO SELF PLAYED A ROLE IN MY EXCESSIVE FEAR AND ANXIETY

Later in life I observed that the real reason why I avoided people is that I wanted to have a superior ego, a big self; in Adlerian psychological categories, as a result of my inherited medical issues that made it impossible for me to compete physically with other people I developed a sense of inferiority and compensated with desire for a superior self and felt a need to defend that false big self. Avoidant behavior was a means of defending the false big self (my personality type is avoidant personality disorder, aka shy person).

I avoided people to avoid the rejection of my desired big ego self. If I did not have a need to protect my false big self I would not have to avoid people.

Thus, I stopped seeking a big ego. In time I succeeded and no longer desire a big self and could care less whether folks see me as a big ego or small ego self, socially important or nothing.

Thereafter, I no longer try to protect my big ego by avoiding people. I relate to people and if rejected so be it.  It was my desire to protect a false big self that made me feel anxious around people and avoided doing many things while in society.

It was actually my effort to protect my big self that led to whatever failures I had in life. Without desire for a big self I simply go do what I want to do  and succeed in some and fail in some and such is life; you win some and lose some; you cannot win them all for you do not have talent in all things.

To avoid running away from people to go maintain your desired important ego, an ego that fears social rejection lest it feels small, then give up the wish for a big ego; simply accept that your ego is nothing and that your body is nothing; if your ego is nothing, which it is, and you do not wish for its opposite, something important, then you do not have to defend it.

If you accept human existential unimportance, and eventually accept that the ego is a fiction, a make belief self that does not exist but seems to exist by pretending to exist, you can be with people and not fear their rejection.

We actually have different selves, selves that are beyond empiricism; our real self cannot be comprehended by our scientific categories, for they cannot be observed; nor am I here to talk about it. Let me just assert that I know that each person has a spiritual self, a self not in form, a self that is part of all selves and our father, God. That subject is beyond the scope of this essay.

FEAR, SPACE, TIME AND THE ENTIRE PHYSICAL UNIVERSE WERE DESIGNED TO MAKE SEPARATED EGO SEEM REAL

Our bodies, space, time, matter and the entire physical universe are illusions; they do not exist but made to seem to exist in a dream state so as to make the idea that we can separate from God (our whole self) seem real.

In fact, fear itself does not exist in truth but is made to seem to exist; fear is an illusion that seems to protect the ego hence makes the ego seem to exist.

The whole charade is to make one see one's self as apart from God. Until you have had unitive experience whereby your body disappears and the world of space, time and matter disappears and everything in space, galaxies, stars, planets, trees, animals, people, disappears and you simply experience yourself as one with formless God (universal consciousness, universal intelligence) you would not understand what I am talking about.

For now see what I said here as heuristic and simply love you and love all people and leave it at that. If you love all people you would experience relative, not perfect peace and joy; perfect peace and joy is only possible in formless God, heaven, unified spirit self.

IT IS NOT FOR YOU TO CHANGE OTHER PEOPLE; YOU CANNOT DO SO; IT IS EGO TRICK TO PREVENT YOU FROM CHANGING YOU TO HAVE YOU FOCUS ON WHAT YOU CANNOT DO, CHANGE OTHER PEOPLE

You cannot change other people no matter what you do. It is only the individual who can change his self. The ego has a trick, it asks you to see the problems in other people and concentrate on changing them; it knows full well that you cannot change other people. It wants you to fail and feel disappointed in people.

However, you can talk to people on how they can change themselves but do not ever hope to change them.  Do not go about making militant speeches on how to change people, the type that Malcolm X did; what you can do is give calm, sedate lectures that help people to understand themselves so as to change their issues by themselves.

SUCCESS OR FAILURE IS A SPIRITUAL MATTER

Human beings are spiritual beings having physical dreams. What each person does on earth is not entirely due to his earthly experience, is not just the result of his body and society (those are chosen to make the behavior seem determined by ego and body).

Each person has a preordained script that he and all of us wrote for him before we came here to earth and he and us enact it out; in that sense each of us must experience what he must experience for his script and our script calls for it.

If a role is not part of your script you cannot play it. If our collective script did not call for you to be, say, the head of state you will not be it. The script calls for you to be something else. One role is not necessarily better than others but each person has a role and must play his role.

For example, the dumb one called Donald Trump is currently enacting the role of an idiot US president. There is a reason for it; he has finally shown the world that the American Presidency is not the big deal that folks had assumed that it is; that office is sometimes occupied by idiots. The present idiot in the White House has finally told the world that they do not have to respect every person in the White House for some of the occupants are sub human beings.

After Trump folks would no longer see the US president as anything but a weak and imperfect human being; that is the reason why we Americans elected this embarrassing buffoon as our President (I cannot believe that the emotional and intellectual nine year old clown is my president!).

CONCLUSION

The thesis of this essay is that we seek for people and things to blame for our fate but that we are responsible for our fate.

Obviously, we live in a system where everything is connected; the behavior of all people affects you and your behavior affects all people.  No one is saying that the individual is an island.

What is being said is that despite our mutual influences that in the final analysis each of us has the capacity to choose his behaviors.

One can choose not to blame other people and simply do what one feels is right. To do so one must overcome fear, for if you insist on living your life as you see fit some persons who want you to live as they want you to live so as to dominate and control you will try their dandiest to get you to kowtow to their perspective on life; in some instances they may attack and even kill you. That is reality.

Just stick to doing what you believe is right. If other people attack you then fight them and if in the process you are killed that is glorious death. But under no circumstances should you allow fear to dispose you to do things just because your society and other persons ask you to do so.

No individual has complete information on anything; be that as it may, struggle to obtain as much information as you can on any subject and do what your present truth is. You change your truth when more information comes to you.

In the meantime, you do not permit other people to push you around just because they have physical brute power to harm and or kill you.

Look death in the face and say: fuck you; I only live for my truth, not other people's truths. In my case my truth is love for all human beings and working for our common social interests.

Ozodi Thomas Osuji

November 27, 2017

www.centerformindscience.org

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Ozodi Osuji Ph.D

Ozodi Thomas Osuji is from Imo State, Nigeria. He obtained his PhD from UCLA. He taught at a couple of Universities and decided to go back to school and study psychology. Thereafter, he worked in the mental health field and was the Executive Director of two mental health agencies. He subsequently left the mental health environment with the goal of being less influenced by others perspectives, so as to be able to think for himself and synthesize Western, Asian and African perspectives on phenomena. Dr Osuji’s goal is to provide us with a unique perspective, one that is not strictly Western or African but a synthesis of both. Dr Osuji teaches, writes and consults on leadership, management, politics, psychology and religions. Dr Osuji is married and has three children; he lives at Anchorage, Alaska, USA.

He can be reached at: ozodiosuji@gmail.com (907) 310-8176