Saturday, 10 February 2018 03:20

You do not win people over to your side by insulting them

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Ozodi Osuji

From the moment that I subscribed to Nigerian Internet forums I read Biafra Internet warriors calling Nigerians negative names. If you dared not support their point of view they go to war insulting you. They fish out degrading names from their Igbo-English dictionary and call you such names. Apparently, in their minds they hope to shame you and hope that out of shame you would go away and leave them to stay at the forums to abuse other people.

Here is a question: who have they verbally abused that left the forums so that they have the field? Those they abused the most, such as Bolaji Aluko, Joseph Igietseme and Ozodi Osuji are still around. Those, in fact, learned to tune them out and not even bother reading and responding to their predictable but jaded verbal abuses.

They say that if you do the same thing, over and over, again, and keep on getting the same results and you keep on doing it hoping to obtain different results you are insane.

You do not shame people into abandoning their truth. You persuade them with whatever rational resources is available to you. Even then you may not be able to change people's core beliefs. It is actually not for you to change people. If you hope to change people you are playing god hence insane.

You make friends by not insulting people, but by loving and respecting people. You show people your perception of reality and leave them to decide what to make of your perception.

Nigeria must be restructured into twelve states with each major tribe a state, for example, Igbo state, Yoruba state, Edo state, Ijaw state, Efik state, Benue state, Niger state, Bornu state, Hausa state etc. This arrangement lets each ethnic group rule itself and develop at its pace (in a kind of confederation, as exists in Switzerland...there the Germans, French and Italians rule themselves in their respective regions).

This must be tried and if it does not work out well then we try total separation from each other (in the long run all Africa must have an Africa federation with each ethnic group a state, for a total of about 500 states in Africa Federation).

In the "Art of War", Sun Tzu (5th century BC) advised that you get close to your enemy, to study and know him, and not chase him away.  The book has been around for over twenty five hundred years. It and Carl Von Clausewitz (1780-1831), "On War" and Niccolo Machiavelli (1532), "The Prince" are employed in training military officers in the armies of the world. Igbos should try being tactful and diplomatic rather than their irritating tendency to insulting folks; insulting folks makes them your enemies; your enemies dig in and fight you and if you do not have what it takes to defeat them they  win over you; Hausa, Fulani and Yoruba are the winners in Nigeria's politics. If what you have always done does not work out well for you then try something else. Try respecting people instead of identifying with a false, deluded, superior self and from that fictionally exalted self-give yourself the neurotic permission to degrade people. You do not have existential right to degrade anyone and if you do you must be degraded by those you degraded. As you do to people are done to you by them. This is called karma (what goes around comes around). Give love and respect to people and you get love and respect from people; give insults to people and you will be given insults by people. Igbos give insults to Nigerians and Nigerians insult them by marginalizing them in deciding who gets what, when and how (this is Harold Laswell's definition of power- politics).

Ozodi Osuji

February 9, 2018

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Ozodi Osuji Ph.D

Ozodi Thomas Osuji is from Imo State, Nigeria. He obtained his PhD from UCLA. He taught at a couple of Universities and decided to go back to school and study psychology. Thereafter, he worked in the mental health field and was the Executive Director of two mental health agencies. He subsequently left the mental health environment with the goal of being less influenced by others perspectives, so as to be able to think for himself and synthesize Western, Asian and African perspectives on phenomena. Dr Osuji’s goal is to provide us with a unique perspective, one that is not strictly Western or African but a synthesis of both. Dr Osuji teaches, writes and consults on leadership, management, politics, psychology and religions. Dr Osuji is married and has three children; he lives at Anchorage, Alaska, USA.

He can be reached at: (907) 310-8176