Monday, 30 January 2012 00:46

Reasons you are not married

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You are not married not because there is no man ready for marriage as  a good number of men are looking for life partners. The major reason  Nigerian men are now scared of marriage is waywardness. Men are now  afraid because they don’t know who to trust and also not sure if that  beautiful girl they are interested in still has her womb intact.

They  are also afraid because of the high mountain ladies have suddenly placed themselves on as no woman wants to date a poor man any longer but  are all interested in those with good cars and houses.
A man  recently told me why he does not allow his girlfriends to come to his  house. According to him, he doesn’t want a case where a girl enters his  house only for her to refuse leaving because of the beauty of the house  and cars she will see.

Isn’t it surprising how single ladies now  out-dress married women with good jobs whose husbands are very rich? You  are not married because the single men around you are wondering if they  will be able to meet up with your ever-demanding lifestyle. Even when  they know they can afford it, what makes them believe you won’t take a  walk tomorrow if anything goes wrong?

Another reason is that with  your good job and salary, they are even afraid to come near you as they  wouldn’t want to be turned down.

I have a female colleague, a very  pretty girl who lives in her own house and drives a posh car. She also  has different businesses to show for it. Recently, I advised her to calm  down a bit as friends I introduce her to who ordinarily would have gone  for her, all run away after meeting her and come back to me with the  same word, “Amara, this one go send me go village.”

Another reason  you are going to grow old in your father’s house is this: You want a  ready-made man instead of a growing man with vision. Are you aware that  if you have not obtained favour from God, the man will decrease instead  of increasing when you enter his house? Work on your character, the  words that come from your mouth, your lifestyle, the way you carry  yourself, the way you dress, the places you visit and then spend time  trying to find favour before God because it’s only favour that can make  your husband increase the moment you step into his life.

In fact,  the moment a man proposes to you, there must be some positive movements  in his finance if at all you have obtained favour.

It is never  your duty to find a man. While he is working trying to raise money to  sustain whoever he takes home to his mother, you should get yourself  busy obtaining favour from God for you to be his source of blessing. A  man knows when the wife is a source of blessing and that is the only  time he cherishes you.

In the previous paragraph, I said the man  should take you home to his mother. I don’t understand why you get  married to a man who believes it’s just between the two of you. Read the  Bible; they all took their wives home to their mothers. If a man cannot  take you home to his people, something is wrong. Isn’t it surprising  how many of us are married without knowing our husband’s village and his  mother’s bedroom? Marriage, in the African culture, is not between the  man and woman alone, the two families must be involved.

Hey, you  have to stop moving from one prayer house to the other in search of  miracles that are not coming even after you might have emptied your  pocket. Go back to your room; deal with your character and bad nature  that is filled with pride and disrespect for the elderly. Cut down on  frivolities and that is not all, deal with your party and aso ebi  spirit. You must also deal with that thing that gets you to aimlessly  move from one end of the street to the other all in search of precious  souls to destroy. Change that mentality that says you use what you have  to get what you want; any man you get with your ass is as filthy,  unreliable and irresponsible as you are.

Common girl, go deal with  yourself first before you start blaming your step mother of being the  one keeping you down. Stop blaming your neighbours and friends of  standing on your way to progress. I just told you the bitter truth which  your Alfa, Babalawo, pastor andImam may never tell you. Stop wasting  your time chasing shadows, go and deal with yourself first before  complaining.

I know of a wonderful lady who sings so well that  when she comes to lead in worship, miracles take place. People love her,  but this lady is unmarried till date. It is not because men don’t go to  her for marriage or because she is ugly; her number one obstacle is her  character. They say there are many old single ladies in our churches; I think I know the problem and not that most of them wasted their lives  in frivolities only to realise the last minute that they have to run  into the church where they can get a brother to marry.

I am not  trying to judge anyone’s past, but the issue is that even when they join  those churches, their characters don’t change. It’s really appalling  how some ladies talk to men simply because they are in the same church.  Some of them fight everyone in their department in church while some  live their lives begging from one member to the other. 

What do you have to say about ladies who fight for food during church meetings?  Those guys would be foolish to see the stuff you are made of and still  go ahead to take you home to mama.
I always tell ladies that if by  the age of 30 no man had asked to know if you are for sale, there is  something wrong somewhere; its either spiritual or attitudinal, but the  truth is that it is always more attitudinal than spiritual.You  have been fasting and praying and going for all levels of deliverance  but it seems nothing is working. What is your character like after all  the prayers and religious devotions? It is sad when I see a single girl  walk up to a married woman sitting with her husband and telling the  woman to get up because she was there before her. You attend functions  with extra bags to pack food and drinks and when it’s time to hit the  dancing floor, you do that as if there is no tomorrow. What do you  expect from life when you are the source of all quarrels in your  neighbourhood, church and office?

This is the moment of truth and  if at all you want to be delivered, your decision to deliver yourself is  the first step to your breakthrough.

Culled from PM News

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