Sunday, 15 May 2016 20:56

Nigerian Problems Attributable to Habits of Unfit Parents

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According to recent  reports. a group of secondary school students in Forms 1 and 2 were caught having group sex in Kenya. They were 5 boys and one girl. Their ages ranged from 15 to 17 years. They were caught in a room they had rented in the Kipkorgot Estate in the outskirts of Eldoret, Kenya  for the purpose of having orgies. The students came from different schools in Nandi, Uasin, Gisha, Elgeyo  Marakwet County areas. https://www.naij.com/829062-six-secondary-school-students-caught-room-will-shock-photo.html?source=notification

The boys and girl were caught red handed in the very act. What did the authorities do after experiencing the initial tsunami-like astonishment? The principal appeared to be in the worst shock of his life. and then he and some villagers proceeded to give  the students a  thorough thrashing with tree branches. A thrashing is a beating, trouncing, whipping, spanking, or punishment with an object.

This essay is not intended to examine whether the youngsters enjoyed the fruit of their misbehavior or to debate the appropriateness of the punishment. We bear in mind pieces of evidence supporting Abraham Maslow in his research on Hierarchy of Human Needs which states that sex is an important human need without which man as we know it would be extinct.  The purpose of this essay is to cogently argue that children learn unpleasant habits of parents before them through direct reaching, modeling or observation. Read on to find out how this takes place in the case of Nigerian parents and their unfortunate wards.

The aim of this essay is not to denigrate or look down on Kenyan society. We are not interested in pouring scorn on the hilarious names Kenyan cities bear, nor are we going to be hypocrites pretending that Kenya's young people are endowed with the worst sexual aberration foreign to our children. That Kenya's youngsters should go down in Guinness World Record as a group with the most  sexually aberrant behavior in Africa is a wrong conclusion that should not be drawn from this essay.

An aberration can be described as a deviation, abnormality, anomaly, irregularity, peculiarity, eccentricity, or oddness. Sex is not quaint or old-fashioned. The problems are the modern attitudes and acts held and practiced respectively with uncanny regularity in most African communities, Nigeria included.

Let's ignore the imputation often heard  in many circles that Kenyans often win Olympic Marathons and other races because they run as hyenas down Mount Kilimanjaro. Let's  further ignore the  allegations that Kenyans are as ugly as baboons when compared to Nigerians  and that their sex acts on tree limbs are similar to  the gyration  (twist, roll, and twirl) of monkeys. Don't push that ugliness and sexiness talk too far because there are many Yorubas  who are as ugly as or uglier than their Kenyan counterparts. What is the reason why Igbos practice genital mutilation when removing the clitoris of females? is it done to cool off the fucking proclivity or inordinate sexual appetite?

Millions of young people in Nigerian,  Ghana, Zimbabwe, and all of the 54 countries  in Africa (nay in the world) can be lumped  together and seen  as peas in a giant pod, Bad behavior, which  is not limited to any geographical area, has been going on since Great Britain decided to liberate Nigerians from life of savagery in the wilds give them a semblance of civilization. On God's earth. Those of us who pin the blame only on the white man and eventually on the children are not only being unpatriotic, nearsighted or myopic, but are hypocritically  given to incessant moralizing or pettiness.

Nigerians wear moral lenses that leave a lot to be desired.   Bad behavior doesn't happen in a vacuum, and there's nothing like unprovoked provoker. Everything that is learned can be unlearned through reinforcement or systematic desensitization, respectively.   Evil men blame their problems on indefensible agent, such as God who quietly endures unreasonable tasks unjustifiably dumped on His laps. Rarely do we blame problems going on in Nigeria on negligent parenting.  To be honest, poor parenting is at the root of corrupt and thieving leaders who siphon public funds away and leave citizens wallowing in abject poverty. You are what your parents taught you.  The fact is unquestionable, indisputable, guaranteed, and unassailable.

Can we blame God for allowing these Kenyan boys to engage in orgies as though Sex were a part of the academic curriculum? We might as well ask God: "If You did not mean for us to have sex in the manner these Kenyan young people did, why did You invent penises and vaginas in the first place, and why not build internal sex control mechanism in our bodies as You did with our disease-fighting apparatus?

It is not God's business that African parents are so busy chasing after Naira (Nigeria) or Shillings (Kenya) that they abdicate their principal responsibility for raising children " in the way they should go and not depart therefrom."  A parent who abdicates is said to renounce, relinquish, resign from, hand over a duty, give up trying, or simply abandon proper child-rearing duties.  Whichever way you see it, a picture of the unfit African parenthood shall not fail to appear.

A parent  is unfit so long as he/she has unhealthy attitudes; is morally bankrupt; flabby in judgment; in poor condition in thinking; out of control in pursuit of pleasure;  ailing, or simply sick in the head. Lamentably, African parents have very, very weak parenting skills.  They do bad things without realizing their children are watching, learning, and imitating.

Think back a little. There was never a day you did not receive requests or phone calls from your mother, sister or brother in Nigeria , commanding you to send some Naira  or Dollars "for my children's school fees."  Haven't you been pestered to shell out money for school fees, boarding fees, uniforms, chinchi-infested mattress, garri, rice, or science lab, among others on the endless lists of Nigerian school requirements?

These requests are made when the woman (your sister or mother)  wants to wash hands off raising her offspring in preparation to be a harlot. Yes, your sister and mother are harlots. If you are offended, what can you do about it? You are a product of harlotry. The odd is to that you too would be ashawo like your mother or a womanizer preying on little children like your father.

You've been pestered, haven't you? If you deny you have not been pestered about sending money for a relative's school fees, you need to be reminded that to be pestered is to be bothered, annoyed, harassed, worried, beleaguered, disturbed or bullshitted. Perhaps you must be a person whom your folks consider to be penniless and worthless.

The point is this: Nigerian parents abdicate their responsibilities to children barely weaned from Mama's breast milk. Parents dump A-B-C  kids aged 3 to 6 years  in boarding schools under the pretennse that private schools are better than public (Jakonde) schools.  Mothers gladly wash their hands off as they feverishly busy themselves with chasing after wealth, especially in trading in such food stuffs as garri, egusi, dry fish, vegetables, and fruits. Nigerian woman traders double up as Madams selling toto (pussy) on the side.

Some enterprising Nigerian mothers take to covert prostitution in addition to gba mgbere (price haggling in markets) . Husbands go about supplementing whatever wives bring in from mgbere and ashawo (haggles and prostitution) .  Chasing after money leaves no time to adequately care for children and see about their moral development. The devil finds work for idle hands. How does it play out in the real sense?

While mothers are busy being married prostitutes bringing income to help purchase a reliable family mode of transport  (Mercedes, Toyota SUV) and build family homes in township and village, daughters are abandoned in boarding schools.  Female hostels and  dormitories at Nigerian schools are virtually houses of prostitution that operate 24/7. Regular customers frequenting these ashawo  houses include the State Governor, Deputy Governor, Chief of Police, Professors, and other VIP's . Those who cannot make it  the scene or fear  being discovered by the Nigerian rapacious Press send the their drivers and messengers to drop and pick up females students.

While this writer was on the reaching staff of a Nigerian post-secondary institution, he was approached by a married Nigerian woman who brought her young daughter aged 13 or 14 years old. The idea was for the writer to have sex with the daughter in exchange for introducing the mother to college official responsible for awarding provision contract (rice, gari, and beans). It doesn't just end with the universities and colleges as human trafficking centers of prostitution.  Girls at the boarding secondary schools are not spared the scourge or curse.

Young female students at most of Nigerian universities and colleges are known to be sex hawkers. The hottest hawkers seem to be the young, attractive girls of the Igbo, Yoruba, Rivers, Hausa, and Idoma ethnicities. Immediately after the Biafra War ended, gossips had it that a few schools were noted as providers of young prostitutes. The schools included Ovim Girls, Awkunanaw Girls, QRC;  the University of Nsukka, University of Abuja, Alvan Ikoku College of Education, and the rest of colleges with large percentages of females from poor families.

Northern universities at Jos, Zaria, Kano, are centers of prostitution. Guess why the Northern leaders are callous kleptomaniac who cannot resist the urge to steal public funds entrusted to their care?  It is because they've been raised as Fulani and Hausa bastards who don't have the  faintest inkling of who their mothers and fathers are and therefore have no feeling of obligation to the family structure.

Anywhere bastards congregate, they gather harems of prostitutes around them to gain a feeling of self-importance. Try to ask a Northern Governor: "Sir, who is your father or mother?" Chances are close to 1.0 (perfect positive correlation) he doesn't know. Why must he know when he is a product of prostitution?  Moslem men have pros titutes housed and maintained with public funds all over the world in America, Great Britain, Canada, Saudi Arabia, and Australia.

The demand for young sexy hawkers didn't  just come from the higher echelon of Nigerian society consisting of politicians and managers of government department, but Nigerian businessmen joined in the rush, often driving from Lagos to the East on weekends to pick up girls. The hawkers were told: "Come let's go on tour away from here."

The destinations are usually Dubai, Disney World in Orlando, Florida,  Lagos or some cities close to Lagos. A vendor usually promises to deliver a handsome package to the hawkers consisting of  comfortable lodging comfortable hotels, food  and alcohol, shoes and sandals, jewelry, yards of cloths to be sewn into dresses with matching headdresses, and of course money.

A dash of N1,000 or N2,000 was considered adequate compensation for  a girl from a poor family. Could she handle such a huge fee for a week of "work?" After the young sex hawker is brought back from Lagos to the dormitory unnoticed by the matron who is paid to be asleep  ot to look the other way, the hawker brings out her package to show off the gifts much to the envy and admiration of roommates. She goes into the recruitment of other hawkers whom she promises to introduce to friends of her vendors from Lagos.

How did the Kenyan youngsters pay for hotel rooms where the orgies took place and who did the recruitment? If you want to determine which Nigerian youngsters would participate in aberrant sexual behaviors, such as group orgies or the sales of vaginas to whoever can afford the cheap price (N2000 or $6.3) look no further. Just look at their fathers and mothers for easy indicators.

Finally and that is not all, bear in mind that nonsensical parenting is as prevalent in Nigeria as is rampant corruption. Regrettably, some Nigerian husbands are so bad they rent family beds out to customers who would pay to have sex with their (husbands') wives. Why? A husband suffers pressure from diabetes which precludes sexual intercourse, plus pressure from mounting housing and food bills.  What do you expect him to do? You must answer the question!

Submitted by Dr. James C. Agazie, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

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James Agazie Ed D

A retired college Professor  with educational backgrounds in law (JD) education (Ed.D, MA) counseling,( MS) and and mathematics.  Write on topics dealing with Nigerian families, marriages, education, and employment.